This is a fictitious short story written about a moment in the life of Peter from the perspective of one of the twelve disciples, Thaddaeus. It is a picture of what Peter was like before he learned about grace and truly knowing what Jesus was all about. 

To be honest, we were all getting sick and tired of him. I think even Jesus was fed up, because every now and then Jesus would just let into him like I never had seen before. Jesus was very serious in these times and he made sure that you understood that he wasn’t joking. He did this all too often with Peter.

I want to be honest about this—for the most part, you just never really want to be around Peter. He has to do it his way and there is always no other way with him. To a word, he is demanding. That was the thing that puzzled us all so much, because on the one hand, Jesus could be so hard on Peter, but then at the other, Peter was always at his side and seemed to be his favorite. Often, this perplexed us. I remember one time in particular when Jesus had left us for a few hours and ventured off to be by himself—Peter just went crazy, telling us all what to do. He chided almost every single one of us, but specifically both Thomas and Bartholomew really got it that day. He went on and on about how he was disgusted with their subtle criticisms of where we were going and how we were spending our time. He lost it, ranted, raved, and cursed them as his face got red. We all just stood there, white-faced and our mouth’s open, amazed at what we were seeing and hearing. We couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. This was when I began keeping my distance from him. Peter could be passionate, but he could also be dangerous. He seemed only to hurt those around him with his words and actions.

The incident that really pushed everyone over the edge was just yesterday. After this, out of all eleven of us, I don’t think Peter has one friend; maybe his brother Andrew, but that is just because they are brothers. Granted, it was late and we were hungry and most of us were a bit edgy, because we knew that something was about to happen. I still cannot understand how he could say such words, especially because of all that we had gone through in these last years as brothers. Jesus was trying to get it into our heads that by going to Jerusalem something was going to change, something dramatic was going to occur. Admittedly, we were all a bit afraid, but Peter said some things which I am not sure any of us will forget. That was no way to talk to someone. To be honest, I was a bit angry that Jesus didn’t confront him on his attitude toward us.

It wasn’t what Peter said so much as how he said it. He spoke with venom. As Jesus was telling us in his own way that there would be challenges ahead for us as we went to the city, Peter in his loud and boisterous way, spit into the air his words, “Jesus, these, these, may forget about you, but I will never!” Angrily, he was pointing his finger, sweeping it across us all. Again, he shouted, “These, Rabbi, may forsake you, but not me!” After that, I never trusted Peter. Maybe he had more zeal than all of us, but something is just not right about that man. I can’t put my finger on it, but I wouldn’t be surprised if things end badly with him. His passion is strong, but his gentleness is none. Nothing good can happen to a man like that. There is only one hope for him; Jesus is going to have to do something dramatic to change him.

In: Friend to Jesus